Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Epiphany about Self Worth

I went on vacation to Florida last week. It should have been filled with joy and great memories of my baby's first trip to Florida, Disney World, and the beach. Instead I was filled with almost constant anxiety over my weight.

On the last day of the trip I finally said, "No more."

I am so glad that I did the 30 Day Shred. I am glad because I felt healthy and strong. I am glad because I was teased in high school because I wasn't athletic enough to be considered for even just-for-fun games between friends and this proved to me that I can darn well do whatever I please and don't tell me that I can't thankyouverymuch. I am glad because now I know that I have will power and self control.

Now it's time to move on.

I can't think about my weight anymore. I want to be healthy and I will still work out and try to watch what I eat to a certain extent. But I am done weighing myself even weekly. I simply cannot do it anymore and I am certain that it is not where God wants me at all.

I would like to find another 30 day goal. I've been listening to David Platt's sermons on materialism, and I've been playing with the idea of a $2.00 a day fast.

Did you know that 2.6 billion people live on less than $2.00 a day? That's how much I spend on a soda.

I have basically decided to make the commitment to eat on $2.00 a day for the month of August. I'm still trying to figure out the logistics of that, and I know that $2.00 a day would cover food, shelter, and clothing for those in poverty, but I have set expenses that would make that impossible. So this is what I can do. Spend a total of $62 for groceries/toiletries for myself during the month of August and pray for those in physical suffering while I try to live on the bare minimum.

I want to live Radically. I want people to ask me about the hope that I found and I want to live like I have hope that has nothing to do with this world. I want to look for ways to be Jesus to people.

This may seem simplistic, but I'm working on changing my mindset.

1 comment:

  1. Good for you!!! You are such a good person & I am glad to know you!