Rock Paper Scissors

When you are pregnant, before going to sleep you must decide between three ways of laying down. Let me explain.

If you are having heartburn, you need to be propped up.

If you want to breathe, you need to lay on your side.

If your feet and ankles are swelling, people demand that you prop your feet up. Demand.

The problem is, if you did all of these things at once (which most of us really need to do), you end up looking like this:

Or, if you're really confused:

So it really becomes a game of rock, paper, scissors every night. It's a rotating game, really, since you never know when your desire to breathe will overcome the desire not to throw up stomach acid a little in your mouth which trumps that you don't want to tell people that, no, you didn't prop your feet up.

Well, we're off to the races today. First Saturday in December is when we celebrate the husband's grandma's birthday every year and this year we've also decided to cram in the baby shower. Ah. Life.