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Well, here we are, two and a half weeks past delivery, and can I just say that motherhood? Nothing like I thought it would be. Even with all the well-meaning advice I was given, I can safely say that nothing actually captured the essence of what being a mother is actually like.

I thought that being a mom would change me. That's what people kept saying to me. "It will change your life." "Wait until you become a mom, it changes you." This thought terrified me because, well, I really liked the way that I was. I didn't really want to change. What I found, though, is that it didn't change me. It added on to who I was. I now have this dimension added to me that I didn't have before.

Maybe to say that none of it was true isn't exactly correct. Once while I was pregnant I confided to my mom that I was really terrified that having a baby was going to change Jordan and I's relationship. We had really just gotten in the groove of being married and we had always been best friends. I didn't want us to no longer have time together or for him to just start seeing me as a mom. My mom said, "You're right. It will change it. Because you'll have his child and you'll have a stronger relationship than ever before. I think that is absolutely true. There is a new level in our relationship that we have not had before, and I'm so grateful for it and looking forward to seeing where it leads.

Peanut is doing so awesome. He cries when he's hungry or when we're changing his diaper. That's basically it. Heaven child, I know.

In case you're wondering, the above picture is Jordan's Aunt Amy's doing. If you see any of my pictures and are interested in her work, let me know and I will shoot you her email. 

 

Overall, I can't get over how incredibly blessed I am to be with this great family. I am so overwhelmingly in love with my husband still. In fact, it just seems to get better and better every day. Last night I fell asleep on the couch and he just left me there all night. This might seem like not an awesome thing, but the baby sleeps in our room and even when Jordan volunteers to get up with him in the night, I usually wake up first and just do it. I was too far away to hear the crying and I slept all night long for the first time since my mom stayed over and kept him in the guest room.

And then I have this absolutely perfect little baby boy. I forgot to take my prenatals every day, folic acid made me vomit, I ate fast food 75% of the time, and I refused to take thyroid medication because it made me feel like I was on speed but he's still perfectly healthy in absolutely every way. He had to be vacuumed out, and they told me that he would have a misshapen head for a while and more than likely develop jaundice. He, seriously, had a perfectly round head from birth and no jaundice ever.

Look at that round head!

I don't know how he survived my roller coaster of a pregnancy so unscathed, except by the grace of God.

And because he's Superman

I have been so richly blessed and I am truly grateful. It is really God demonstrating His grace in my life because I have done absolutely nothing to deserve it. Without a doubt.

If you want more pictures, check out my facebook page in a bit. I will have them uploaded there. www.facebook.com/Motherhoodat24.